Change

A lot of things have changed. Today, my whole belief suddenly crumbled down, and shattered into pieces. Why am i dreaming of perfection when there's no way of achieving it? Life can't possibly be perfect. Only heaven is. But that's a long way to go.

In a few hours i'll be heading back to Terengganu. It's a great escape. Going home always is. It gets really empty here. And now emptier. For some unknown reason, i feel like im living too 'silently'. i like to be unnoticed. Even at home. But should i continue my life this way?

I miss a lot of things. I'm not trying to have what i used to have in the past. For now, i want to cherish the chances of happiness i have. But - should i give up certain happiness that will later break my heart? or should i just let it be.

Maybe i should start taking care of myself; pampering and indulging in things that i have long abandoned. Care more about what happens outside, and put restrictions on myself too.

Ah, what's this?Self-Reflection? Haha. I think so.

Ah - i feel so down tonight! Am i really hopeless????